Sex is hard enough to talk about in our society without having to actively unlearn decades worth of hokey religions and ancient bullshit. To talk about sex in a marriage founded on a hokey religion while actively working to re-learn and re-construct your sex life- jedi level. This week ExXtian Erin joins Nate and in a conversation about what it’s like to do just that, while doing our best to pass on a few mind tricks and further your training.
Read moreGender Purity
From seatbelts to power chords there’s an underlying assumption in our society that male goes into female JUST LIKE NATURE INTENDED. We tend to ignore the bees and the bonobos and everyother good goddamn creature under the sun by believing that two complimentary things must go together IN ACCORDANCE WITH GOD’S WILL. Now that we’ve injected a little science to our thinking, what are we left to do with these supposed ideals?
Read moreDating After Deconstruction
Without an all knowing god promising a perfect plan for your life, eternal promises certainly hit a little differently now. If you’ve ever had your reality challenged on that level you can imagine how tricky dating after purity culture can be. Writer and speaker Drew Bekius joins me this week for a personal conversation about life and love after faith loss.
Read moreGreat Sexpectations
With great sex cums great responsibility or… honestly that movie had too many characters. Instead, like poor Pip, let’s take a moment to consider how our assumptions and demands about sex may actually get in the way of the great sex we wish we were having. The pervasive myths and misrepresentations of human sexuality, so prevalent in our culture, more often then not set us up for failure. This week with the help of Kara Griffin and Nate Smith we work to understand those Victorian values and deconstruct our own culture of purity.
Read moreDeconstructing Purity Culture
If there is one through line between Dr. Darrel Ray’s inception of the Secular Sexuality podcast and whatever porn-star-interviewing home-made-kazooing shenanigans SecX has become, it’s the idea that we can unlearn the destructive myths of our sex-negative culture. In deconstructing purity culture we can better empower ourselves to make and share the love that we deserve.
Read morePurity Culture in Black America
The first joke I actually remember my dad teaching me was, fittingly enough, hyper-sexual, racist and way over my head. The punch line made no sense to me, not just because I couldn’t conceive of how someone could eat a bowling ball, but also because I didn’t understand what set black women apart as deserving of judgement. A quarter century later and I’m still not sure I get it but I see the evidence of it everywhere and this week, with the help of Jena Miyu and Vi La Bianca, we’re looking to point out the obvious- like most things in life, the purity culture SecX was built to supplant doubles down on woc. Join us as we take an accounting of the extra challenges of the jezebel stereotype and tackle purity culture within Black America, plus your calls!
Read moreKissing Purity Culture Goodbye with Dr. Darrel Ray
When 2009’s The God Virus eventually led Dr. Darrel Ray to start Secular Sexuality, Purity Culture™ was at the heart of the mission. Now in our third season as part of the Atheist Experience Network Dr. Ray returns to help us understand how we got here and how we can heal. This we’re taking your calls and setting our sights on chewed up bubble gum and the lies that separated us from our sexuality, and we’re all out of bubble gum.
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